Resources

“Therapies often convey to the client that their body is not behaving adequately. The clients are told they need to be different. They need to change. So therapy in itself is extraordinarily evaluative of the individual. And once we are evaluated, we are basically in a defensive state.” Stephen Porges, the Polyvagal Theory

We can develop and discover resourcing strategies that help support your work during and then between sessions. Clients become more familiar with their own nervous system, the energy of parts in their system, and become attentive to the cues. More choices develop. Having agency around one’s own therapeutic process is especially important where only narrow avenues of choice were available in the past. 

  • Sometimes your system would like to regulate and to take a few moments with you. Here are some things you can turn to.

    • Place one hand over your heart, and the other hand over your belly. Take easy breaths in and out, noticing the rise and fall of your hands, the filling and emptying of your belly. Take as long as you like with this and then notice any connection you can feel between your two hands.

    • Cup your left elbow with your right hand and bring it across your chest in a gentle stretch- count to 15 as you slowly release your elbow and bring your arm down to your side. Repeat on other side.

    • Interweave your fingers and stretch your arms in front of you- count to 15 as you move your hands back towards your heart.

    • 6/4/8 breathing (work towards this if it feels difficult) In to a count of 6; hold for 4; exhale out for 8. Repeat 10 times or for as long as you need, until you feel different.

    • Take your attention away from your heartbeat and notice the ground below you; play around with the weight on your feet; your heels; edges of feet and toes; notice the earth’s gravity; anchoring you into the grounding power of the earth. Notice all your favourite things that share this earth with you. You are not alone.

    • Rolling breath

      Inhale a breath; at the top of the inhale imagine a full and rounded quality; let the inhale roll over into the exhale; notice where the breath rolls; front; back; over your sides to your feet, or wherever it travels. Repeat several times.

    • 4/4/6/2 Especially effective before sleep. In to a count of 4; hold 4; exhale 6; hold 2. Repeat for as long as you need.

    • Disconnected or Numb

      Gently squeeze your arms and forearms; if you need something more energetic tap the length of your hands and arms inside and outside and then down the sides of your body and legs; noticing the boundary of your body and its edges. If you can, touching or eating something mindfully can help.

    • Frozen or Panicked

      Wrap yourself in a cosy blanket and take easy breaths; increase your awareness of the here and now by looking around your environment and naming the things that you see, pick a colour that you see and find other objects in the same colour. Open your senses- what do you see, hear, smell? A favourite scent on hand for these moments can help, even if it’s just a piece of fruit like an orange.

    • Get Your Body Laughing

      Watch something that makes you laugh. Get your body laughing.

    • Listen to some music that you really like.

    • Changing your Scenery

    • Sometimes walking into a different space, or going outside and slowly opening your senses can help bring you back into your window of tolerance.

    • Walking exercise

      Bring your attention to your body as you walk; notice how your feet hit the ground, the roll of your foot, your knees and the sensations in your hips, shoulders and arms. Play around with your usual gait.

    • I have adapted these resources from the teachings and experience of brilliant teachers and clinicians. Breathing techniques are ancient Eastern religious practices and philosophy. Dr. Dan Siegal developed The Window of Tolerance. My thanks also to Pat Ogden -Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Institute and Janina Fisher from whom I learnt “Get your body laughing” and all other teachers from whom I have learnt either vicariously or directly.

  • https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles

  • You might have found my website seeking support right now, I do not however provide a crisis support service. Remember these feelings will pass and you are not bad or wrong for feeling them.

    Is there a friendly person you could call or text? Expressing your feelings out loud, writing them down, drawing or movement are valid ways to name or express what’s happening.

    Professional help

    There are people that you can call

    If you are feeling unsafe on your own, suicidal, or having thoughts of serious self-harm the following professionals can help you in the UK: 

    • MIND Charity have an up to date list of mental health crisis phone lines.

    • Samaritans on 116 123 for 24-hour confidential emotional support

    • CASS on 0808 800 8088 (Free number Mon - Thur) from 7pm-10pm) for women looking for confidential non-judgmental support for self-injury.

    • CALM on 0800 58 58 58 (5pm-midnight) support for men anywhere in the UK.

    • Your local mental health crisis team - search your location and ‘mental health crisis team’ 

    • Your GP - call them and make an emergency appointment  

    • Emergency services - Dial 999 and ask for the police or ambulance services 

    • NHS 111 - You can call NHS 111 when you need medical help but it’s not a 999 emergency.